What is going on?!?

I have just ended my first relationship, and it feels a little nice to be a single Pringle, but you don't know what really happened, and how someone's death may be weighing on shoulders...

It was a sunny afternoon, and me and my cousin were talking about how she had just hooked up with her major crush, and they got all lovey-dovey, hugging and holding hands, it made me feel a bit awkward, cause my relationship, was just texting... She told me that I should break-up with him because we never really talked besides through texting which I enjoyed for the 2 weeks we were dating. I agreed with her, and she helped me out by creating the sweetest break-up ever, but little did I know, that this one event was going to throw the balance of the universe. I sent the message, 3 hours... No response, I texted him again, 2 days... No response. I kept texting him over and over for a course of 1 week, and he never texted back or read the message. I began to wonder if he was ignoring me or he killed himself😔. I didn't know what was happening. I was becoming restless, and considering suicide, with the thought I would maybe see him again.... Then, I remembered that him and his family always go to the pool on Sunday's at 6, I pleaded my mom to go, and she finally said yes, I packed up my swim bag and went over at 6, and yet he wasn't there...😣 I waited for him for 3 hours, but he never came.... I came home that night, just to realize that he was probably dead😢 I went back to our messages and realized that the last thing I said to him was "I hate you". As soon as I realized that was the last thing I said to him, I sat down and cried for a good 2 hours before I got up, and decide to kill myself the slow and painful way, not drinking anything... I told one of my friends from 5th grade that I wasn't going to drink anything, his response was "why would you ever think of doing that!" So I explained everything in vivid detail through FaceTime at the end, he ended up crying, and so did I. We sat there on FaceTime for 30 minute just crying at the thought that I had killed someone... He understud my pain, and said that everyone makes mistakes, and that everyone can make there own choices, referencing me breaking up with him. My heart lit up and I pulled out a can of soda, and decided I don't have to die, I can live, but still feel the regret. I feel like this is going to haunt me for the rest of my life, to know that I killed someone, and my last words to them were I hate you, and not I love you... but I made it through with the help of one of my closest friends! Thanks to you😘! The moral of the story is never let someone you care about hear your last words as, I hate you...... it will break a heart and haunt you, forever 😭

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