Good description of feelings. Keep it up but improve grammar
As usual and, sadly, as I have now come to expect from your work, it's littered with grammatical and spelling errors. And, yet again, it's a nothing 'story'.
I just do not understand why you keep writing essentially the same thing over and over again. Not one of your stories is a story in the truest sense of the word. A REAL story has a beginning, a middle and end. Yours don't.
It seems to me you sit in front of your computer and write pretty much anything that comes into your head, whether it makes an iota of sense or not. What is blatantly clear is that you put very little thought or effort into what you submit, given that you make the same mistakes time after time. What's also clear is that you lap up all the praise and ignore the helpful advice given to you. That is to your eternal detriment. You will NEVER improve your writing if you carry on the way you are.
You have the capacity to be a good writer. Unfortunately your innate laziness will ensure that you remain strictly mediocre.