This is an improvement over part one, but you are still making silly mistakes: if you are going to use 'Lace' as an abbreviated form of her name 'Lacey' then the first letter should be capitalised - Lace. Also, you chop and change your mind when you write times in your narrative; at one point you write it in digits and the next reference is written in full. You need to be consistent (written in full is the correct way of doing so) with your writing...

One other small point: you wrote 'suite' instead of 'suit', which changes the whole meaning of the sentence :-)

This is definitely heading in the right direction. Take a few extra minutes to check your work thoroughly before submitting. It will be worth it. Keep up the good work!