MURDER for FUN Reviews
What began as an interesting idea did not really fulfil its potential. Your style of writing in places is very stilted and awkward; old-fashioned, even. At times it reads almost as jokey; facetious even, which robs your words of the impact they were meant to convey. The overall feeling I get from your story is a level of uncertainty as to which direction you meant it to take: a serious dramatic story or one that is a little light-hearted. This story is a little of both at times.
All that being said, there is a good story-teller in you. I hope to read more from you.
One note of caution: it is NOT good practice to use numerals in prose. One should always write numbers in full.
Every one of these sites has someone who decides they are an authority on writing, no matter their own output. Mr Apemann believes my sentences are stilted and awkward (it is a draft) and not apparently 'modern' like his own wishy-washy efforts. Me Apemann, having apparently won a modest prize for one of his less-than-vigorou