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One Last Time Reviews

2 reviews have given an average rating of 4 out of 5 Stars
Andy (Formerly Apemann) gave a rating of 3

Some of the word choices in your story ("CHASMS in your face" - "FONDLING your coarse hair" - "With FLOCKING tears " - "Approaching QUAKE of footsteps") jarred with me. What should have been a memorably poignant piece of writing was spoilt by clumsy and inappropriate word use. Sometime the simplest phrasing is the most meaningful instead of 'overdramatising' with unnecessary descriptions.

Overall though, I liked the piece. A sensitive subject well handled.

lemonslice Thank you very much! I appreciate your feedback. :)
Author -
Kiraa gave a rating of 5

Smoothly bliss and heatbreaking.


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