Trudging Through

We have the power to change our lives. We can improve ourselves, learn new skills and nip bad habits. However, it takes time.

Change is a marathon, not a sprint. You don't have to do much, but you should do it consistantly for a long time. It's quite beautiful how small actions stack to massive change. Lifestyle is huge and somehow it's under your control. It feels like Archimedes moving a ship with pulleys, one little person can have this enormous effect by spreading effort over a long period of time.

Some things are worth waiting for, but it feels bad that when I'm most excited about a change I want to make, I can't just do it all at once. I get so into it and have infinite energy, but only for a week or so. Once that's gone I find it extrememly difficult to do even the small amount that it takes to make permanent change. I mean have I really even improved as a person in the last five or even ten years?

I suppose I have grown, I've developed my worldview and I think I've become more in touch with my emotions, generally making me a nicer and even more thoughtful person. I've also learned a ton related to school, myself and my hobbies. I found the love of my life, I discovered friends I actually want to be around and who accept and support me. I even got into my dream university.

There certainly is a lot that has changed in the past decade, I suppose I just get stuck thinking about the things I'm yet to change. Yes, I'm still trying to get my morning routine to stick and yes I still struggle with just basic chores, but I do have the energy to keep trying and I think that's already a victory. I'm not the person I strive to be, but I'm glad I strive at all. That's by no means a given.

Change is slow, deceptively so. As we change the course of our lives we may forget where we've been and how far we've come. Of course you're not perfect and maybe that makes it hard to be happy with who you are, so don't forget to take a moment every once in a while to look back and be proud of yourself, as the younger you would be.

Take a breath and once you're ready, keep striving.

Author Notes: Sometimes I feel like I've been stuck on the same things forever, but that's just because I no longer need to think about the things I'm no longer stuck on.

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