Australia • 69 y/oReviews Received
I enjoyed your story. The last bit was very amusing. Well done.
You wrote some good banter and an exciting rescue scene. Well done.
"Tbe few customers until the upcoming dinner time."
Try "there were only a few customers between now and dinner time" it flows a bit better.
You describe the characters very well. I like Joey finding wonder in small tbings.
I like the quips and the descriptions of snow and festivities. I wouldn't comment on their talking a man out of suicide as, thankfully, I've no experience of that. I suspect that what works in one case might not in another. Overall its a good story.
You evoke a child's point of view in a more innocent era very well.
A very inspiring and mysterious story. Well done.
You evoke the setting very well, especially the swim on the summers day.
I like the comparison of the ringmaster to a potato. You evoke a different, I think more innocent time very well. The attempted robbey came up ratber suddenly, its as well to foreshadow these tbings. Then again it would be sudden for them. Overall, well done.