Exactly 38 sheets of paper were scattered to my left. A quarter filled jug of water, kept just three steps away from me on the table. The remote for the television was buried under the sofa cushion with three pairs of unwashed socks next to it. The room was exact mess. Nothing was where it has to be but nothing was anywhere I didn’t knew. Whatever be the condition of my room I always knew where each and every thing was. But only didn’t knew two things. First how much money at any point of time I had in my pocket. Secondly, where my pencil was?. Yeah you heard it right my pencil, it was the item I needed the most and never had when I needed it.
I bought I pencil approximately daily. I am musician and the best part about me is there is nothing good about me to tell. The more good about yourself you have, the more you have to talk about it. People are always curious. I don’t like talking much neither answering too many questions. I rarely comb my hairs, I liked it all messed up. You can call me a perfect moron, but this what I loved to be. After the school I got into creating music and never went to college. I sold some pieces of music, as jingles and dubbed an album of mine which was pretty well taken. After that I started going out less. It was only Sunday which I always had a night out at the pub three blocks away. I usually sat, drank very little and only listened to the band that played. I just loved the band.
If you look at my wall, you’ll find thousands of eyes. I have this crazy source of inspiration. I cut out the section of eyes from every photograph I had and also surfed the net to download many more. I had this all made in sort of collage and covered the whole wall. Whenever I look at it I feel good. Its like looking at thousand expressions at a time. That is my inspiration, those expressions in the eyes. but for the past few months this hasn’t been working for me. The eyes couldn’t inspire me much.
I just hit a key on my keyboard and with the sound I decided I need to change. I wanted to study now. I wanted to join a college. That very moment I got up and packed all my instruments. It took me whole day. By the end of the day, I still wasn’t exhausted. So I sat down to decide what I wanted to study. I surfed a few colleges on net and the majors offered by them. I didn’t wanted to study music. After all the search I couldn’t decide what would I study. I jumped over the sofa and the t.v remote popped up from the other side. I switched on the t.v. and the screened opened to show a beautiful world below the ocean. So there and then it was decided. I would study marine biology. I hate myself for deciding this because I hate animals, any kind.
There was exactly no sense in what I decided. I have been literally flunking in science in whole of school life. But I am a man of my moods. I do what I have to, whatever it takes. In the morning I got up and got ready for going to some of the colleges. My getting is usually a pretty fast job because neither I shave too often nor I comb my hairs too damm much. Like those other gentleman guys. But that I somehow I shaved, even my chest and also combed my hairs. Pulled out a clean shinning white shirt and a blue jeans. All this didn’t make look young and dandy. My eyes are always sort of weary.
I visited a few collages, bought the forms and noted the interview dates for all of them. All the interviews were scheduled after a month. In true sense I needed that time because I didn’t had the slightest idea of what marine biology is or even what had happened to science in all these years. I bought few books. Even read a few pages but whenever I had mark any of the lines, I just couldn’t find my pencil. After two days of toil and even turmoil I knew I needed a tution. I gave an advertisement for a teacher who could teach me a bit but my only condition was he or she had to come to my place and teach me. I don’t go to peoples’s houses nor I could understand a bit in group study.
About four entries came. Two male and two female. The male ones were about in their 40’s and none of them was the opinion that I could learn anything, looking at the mess at my place. The females weren’t any young either. Somewhere in their 30’s. I didn’t knew what opinion they had about me. they just walked away as soon as they saw my apartment. One of them even freaked out looking at the ‘eye wall’. I guess she thought I was some sort of serial killer who photographs its target and collected their eye shots.
I didn’t gave up the search. The combination of marine and tution landed me to cuba on google. I looked at the number and called the agency at once. Somebody picked up the phone asked for my requirement and put the call on hold. I never told them that I was about 2000 miles away from them. After sometime a female voice answered. The voice was subtle but not charming or anything. She talked to me for a while, about me qualifications and my conditions. Finally I told her I was 2000 miles away in some other continent. There was a pause, but not of astonishment. Like then one you just have right before a deep thought. After about ten seconds she said, “how and how much are gonna pay”, my answer was “how are you gonna teach”.
You know payment in any corner of the word today is the smallest deal you have to think about. Money can be transferred to any corner of the world with a press of a button. I was paying ten times the money I would have paid to any damm teacher here and she agreed to teach me on phone. I was paying her enough to cover all the call expenses of the call she would have to make. I am rich boy, in the terms that the money I received from my last hit album, I never spent it at all. I multiplied with huge interests.
I connected my phone to the my 7.1 surround sound speaker I used while creating music and used a collar mike to answer. She started with the basics I needed to know. She kept on speaking and listen to her walking in my room. i noted whatever I needed to on my laptop, so that I don’t have to bother about my pencil any more. One week passed we never talked any thing except studies well it was one of my conditions no questions in personal. Then one day, while teaching as usual she suddenly said, “ how old are you?”. it wasn’t like a normal question. It was like she kept on speaking and suddenly spoke it spontaneously”. Even I didn’t paid much heed to it and answered ,”well I am 28 and how old are you”, she said “48” and we continued the study.
After that she continued this way only. She asked a question right in middle of the teaching and continue studying. I didn’t mind that because it wasn’t like any question answer round where you are bombarded with questions. I answered them. After another one week she knew that I was musician, what was the condition of my apartment, what I liked in food, how often did I go out, did I have an extra key to my apartment and where did I keep it when I go out, my favorite color and even my “eye wall”. Well I must say she was quiet a bit of intelligent conversationalist.
The next week to it, she didn’t asked me anything about me anymore. She told about herself. She told me she had a daughter, who was had handicap. She needed supporters to walk, and she was quiet a bit of an artist, her daughter I mean. On the last day of that week I heard her daughter. She was talking to her mother while she was teaching me. She had a pretty catchy voice. To be true I was impressed by her voice. The next week was the last one. In that week she didn’t taught much. She just told stories about what happened to her daughter and how she still lived with a smile only to do what she could do beautifully and now she Is a artist.
I didn’t understood why she told me all this but I didn’t mind listening to her coz I didn’t have to speak much neither console her. She just could make you listen. I had my interview on Monday, she taught me last on Friday, at the end of the lesson she just said “listen my boy, you’ll find the truth and peace in anything you do, till you find a reason for the things you love and still you not do.”
The next day was Saturday. I did nothing except laying back, watching television and waiting for Sunday evening. Finally the evening came. I left my house at around 5:00 in the evening. That night I didn’t even drank the slightest bit. Just stayed at the pub and listened to the music. I walked back to my apartment at 6:00 in the morning. As I reached my apartment stairs, I saw girl standing just few steps from the gate. She called a cab. Her voice was beautiful. The cab came she opened and limped forward. She pulled out the supporters from under her coat and kept inside the car. Then she turned towards me. Those were one beautiful eyes I had seen in a while, they had the most mysterious expression in them. She got in and the cab moved away.
I stayed there for a few seconds and the walked up the steps to my apartment. I unlocked the door and as I stepped in I didn’t have the slightest idea where was my everything. At that moment I was lost. My whole apartment was clean. Everything was arranged. All my stuff was in the exact place where they should have been. For the first time clear sunlight was coming from the window and falling directly on my “e-e-eye wow wall”. It had been totally transformed, all those eyes were arranged some how to match colors and form my face. Before that I never realized it could have happened. I walked towards the table. On the table there were some flowers, a picture of an old woman and a note below it. Which read :-
“ Dear son,
I hadn’t been well for the last three weeks. I was on bed all the time while I taught you. Nobody was near to me except my daughter but she also had her commitments. She always did more than she could for me. she made me record every conversation we had. And then we both used to listen to it in the evening. She was the one who made me ask questions.
I this last week I was in very bad condition and by the time you receive I may not be even alive. I wrote this only to tell you need to do what you love to.”
I dropped the letter and ran back down to the road, I knew it was futile. She was gone but I never wanted a ruin a possibility. She wasn’t there. I went up and opened my musical instrument. The same evening I created the best music in my life. I sent it to the music company. They liked it like anything. I never went to the interview and dubbed the album the next week. The next thing I knew I was I had to fly to cuba.