There is the basis here of a good story. However, clumsiness and failure to check your work before submitting it for publication is in danger of undermining your efforts.

I would advise that you re-read the site's Submission Guidelines. Your work, as presented, breaches a number of them. They are meant to HELP you produce the best work you are capable of. Ignoring them - or not bothering to red them at all - is really not a good idea...