Harold The Homeless Guy
There was once a man named Harold. Now Harold was like 30 years old. He was also living in his parent’s basement. Basically, he was the definition of a lazy fat guy. His routine if you could call it that was, he would eat Cheetos puffs and play video games all day. And one day his parents had had enough. So, they kicked him out of his house. Harold was in the middle of a huge city and had nothing to do. Automatically he started crying his eyes out for about 2 days or so. Suddenly, he was excruciatingly hungry. He started running down the street seeing all the homeless people and large skyscrapers. It took about 5 hours, but he was finally at McDonalds. So, he slammed open the door with sheer brute force. And screamed at the top of his lungs “GIVE ME FOOOOOOOD!”. The employees called security, and they dragged him out of there faster than the flash on red bull onto the parking lot. Harold saw a bald kid with a yellow shirt throwing a fit outside. Poor that’s what Harold was, he needed money, so he did what any good homeless person did and found cardboard, a sharpie rained down from heaven and he wrote “Need $500.”
United States • 36 years old