I Don't Know

By audi

I am so tired of waiting. Waiting for my life to get better but i don't know how much of this i can take. I have no one to talk to about how I feel. So here it is. When i was younger I was bullied ALOT. Once my mom wouldn't let mr invite one of my friends to my birthday party. I told my friend's sister and she got an entire group of her friends, and at recess they chased me around. They were all three years older than me (I was in grade two). They chased me until l eventually treipped and fell. I began to bleed and i almost had an asthma attack because of the amount of time I'd been running. They circled around me as tears streamed down my face I asked them to leave me alone but they didn't. They just called me names and said they wouldn't leave untill a teacher came and i was in trouble. After that they beat down on me. I was praying for help but nobody came untill the teacher came and got mad at me for "excluding others". Inciddents like this continued to happen all the way untill grade 5. my best friend once told me to kill myself but by then i had given up and I never told anybody. I was cutting myself at a young age and i had some very dark thoughts. I transferred schools in grade six. I was feeling better untill grade 7 when the work load caught up to me and everyone at school started hating me. There was a while when i had nobody. During that time there would be moments when I thought of killing myself and then I would be scared of myself for thinking that. I started feeling better but know i just don't know.

Don't know how to act

Don['t know who to be

Don't know who to trust

Don't know where to go

Don't know what is next.

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