Date: 19/05/2020
How can I be free that is all ways in my mind the word free its 6:05 AM? I haven't slept all day. I'm not normal to many things going in my mind I wish there was way to just put my memory in a trash but that not how it works does it. I'm too shy to talk in public it's just I can't it's like someone won't let me talk to others, I talk to myself to much well like in my mind lol. What I think that will make my happy is to be free, love, family, been cute that doesn’t make me happy “family” huh I hate it I HATE MY FAMILY the only person in my family who make's sometimes happy is Nurallah she's my baby sis she's 1 years old how cute, I never like my father it just I didn’t since I was a child he never like e or accepted me for him it was like I want even there. When I was born, I dint know who was my father so I as calling every man I see papa. I remember the day he came home he made so much money so he gave every child $50 and me well I was the last person in the line he gave $5 to me I was heartbroken I was holding myself so hard not to cry, he didn’t even care BUT IT ISNT FIER. Every time I remember this, I start crying. He ever like me just because I want a boy sometimes, I hate myself for been a girl and whenever I hate myself someone tell me to go run, get hurt or kill yourself but I'm scared to die and sometimes when I pray I pray for dyeing isn't weird that a person hates them self that much but not for me . I'm 13 since I'm getting older thinks are not going well my parents won't let me go out with friend, they say my job is go to school, clean the house, look after my sibling's I have been doing this since I was a child. 'll never get happy
Author Notes: I was bored so I writ this and sorry if doesn't make sense hope you like it
Canada • 19 years old