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In the end... It all DEPENDS, by Dr. Philbilly

In the end... It all DEPENDS, by Dr. Philbilly

By DrPhilbilly

Last night my allergies were kicking my butt. I couldn't stop sneezing for nothing so I took a couple of Benadryl which knocked me smooth out. I got the best night sleep I've had in a long time which did turn out to be a blessing, and a curse.

Sometime during the night I rolled over on to my stomach and slept that way the entire night. I woke up around 8am and since I slept thru the night I had to pee really bad. So I rolled out of the bed to make a fast break to the bathroom and landed face first on the carpet. My legs from the knees down, both arms and hands were completely numb.

Apparently I had slept in the same position for hours and every limb I owned went on vacation. In a hotel the bathroom is never far from the bed so I was mentally prepared to pee from the time my eyes popped open, and once your in that head space there is no turning back from it.

I can literally see the toilet as I'm lying paralyzed on the floor and about to pee myself... And I'm wearing my favorite boxer shorts to boot!! How am I gonna explain this to housekeeping!?!

Finally I feel a twitch in my left foot and my right follows soon after. But since I'm still lying face down on my arms they are completely checked out of the situation. Eventually I get enough feeling back that I slowly make it to my feet but I'm swaying around like a giant Weeble Wobble!!

I'm standing in front of the toilet, fighting to keep my balance but my arms still ain't nowhere to be found. You have got to be kidding me!!! I'm twisting my body back and forth but my arms just swing like a couple of limp noodles. Then I start jumping up and down trying to twist out the situation in my drawers but that ain't happening either. 

Finally I feel sharp needles pierce thru my right arm... I gain just enough use of my partially paralyzed right hand that I manage to free willy. But my feet are still not at 100% so I'm bouncing around like I'm on the deck of a rocking boat in rough waters.

I closed my eyes in sweet relief and simply enjoyed the moment. I sure hope and pray that this never happens again. But I guess that in the end, it all DEPENDS!!!... I'm just sayin'!

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28 Jun, 2014
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