Letter to myself

Dear Me

The clock strikes 3 in the morning and i find myself still wide awake tossing and turning thinking and thinking about the day that awaits, my mind is against me but my heart tells me to be strong it tells me that i will eventually find my euphoric key i just need to hold on, there are reasons why people live on and face mundane and sometimes bleak hours of this thing we call life there are reasons we enjoy sunrise every morning bird songs and some people push the thought of suicide away and put down the knife the laughter loved ones ,the warmth of a hug it is in these moments that the wounded souls find bliss

I have written words of hatred towards myself for many years words that i will never call anyone else words filled with anger and fears dear me who has pushed through pain attempted ending it all and has built an indestructible wall to protect whats left of a broken person you love so much and yet never give the same amount of love to yourself you help others when they fall but you hurt yourself instead of asking for help you see all your faults and u tear your self down you continue this cycle until you start to drown

Why cant you see what others see why do you beat yourself up and say what will be will be it may all seem piontless and worthless but you beat the odds before and have set yourself free yes you always get caught and caged that does not stop you from dreaming of that stage where your hope is telling you you will escape again where your family is cheering for you the spark inside of you has become weak and its motivation and ecourage that you seek there have been nights when you have cried and have buried your sorrows and have said you have tried but there is a tommorow that you dread and worry about because you think it will be the same there is no sunshine there is just rain hoping for a love so dear and a future so bright can i run away from my fears dont i have that right so here it is a letter from me to me no matter the hell on earth or the uncertainity of the unknown i must prevail a legacy must be left behind so i must stand up dream big and rise

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