im one of does people that dont fall in love that easy. it was the middle of summer, and my best guy friend was telling me about his friend he knew for about 8 years now. i started talking to him and he sounded like a really cool guy. :/ i never knew this would happen by the time tho.
he made me laugh. he made me feel safe. i forgot to tell you in the beginning, yes i am emo. and yes. i was starting to really fall for this one guy. just him why did it have to be him?
soon everything begins to fall apart. people say he likes me a little bit. i got my hopes up to much. i asked him out he said of course. " i dont know." i waited ...and waited until next thing you know school starts.and everything falls apart.
lies begin. hearts break. drama never seems to come to an end. shit starts people change. and i started to cut myself. you might think im insane but i dont care i was doing this so he wouldnt hurt me.
he never did love me at all. so i sent him a message on my friends profile saying. "theres a girl out there who thinks she is in love with you.. are you blind?"
he sent me "im tired of this shit. stop. im never gonna like her anyway, so shut the fuck up!"
yes. i started crying. i told him it was me he didnt care. at all. he was happy i was going to hate him. to forget him forever.
just happened yesterday night. we got into a bigger fight. he said
" i like you as a friend. but it seems you cant just accept that"
the hardest part of that was i knew id have to forget him forever.
just like that.all of that happened. tomorrow is when we have to go back to school for Christmas break. im gonna have to see him there, his fucking sharp stare. going right through my heart.
i never want to fall in love again. im not pretty enough. i have to be on my own. alone . once again.