There was a young lady of Shannon
Who fired herself out of a cannon
She flew with great ease
Over streams, hills and trees
Then landed unharmed in Dungannon.
Lady Godiva, so it is said,
Caused Peeping Tom to blush bright red
With breasts proudly bared
Only Tom actually dared
To see if they were as grand as was said
There was something quite odd about Mary:
Was it her armpits, so hairy?
Or was it that she was blessed
With hairs on her chest?
Maybe that's why they call Mary scary!
A woman once tried to pass
Herself off as somebody with class
But it was all for show
Because, don't you know,
She had her head up her own arse!!