I use to love hanging out with all the guys from my sisters year, because they were older and definitely fitter then a lot off the guys from my year. We didnt really talk at school much but if i was with a few off my friends in town or something we use to stop and have a chat.
Once when my mum went on holiday me and my sister decided to have a little party so a lot off the guys we hanged out with showed up. It started of okay we had a couple off drinks but then the guys decided to give all the girls shots and then all the trouble begun. I ended up going upstairs with the guy i fancied to pieces. Well as usual two teenagers alone in a room, drunk i think we all know what happened next.
The next day all sober we got up and him and one off his friends left as soon as they could which didn't really make me feel to well, but you know what else can you expect from an 17 year old guy.The next couple off days i saw him at school and after school but we didnt really talk, we just kind off ignored each other. But one thing i couldn't stop thinking about him.
One day everything from that night started being talked about in school. His friends use to tease me saying ' uhhh naughty girl' so one night i talked to him and he just told me to fuck off because he doesnt want anything to do with me. It broke my heart because i loved him, i couldnt stop thinking about him so i started saying it was all my fault and i started to self harm myself.
I told one off my friends he said he wont tell a soul but first he had to have a massive go at me. After about a week i noticed things between me and the guy i loved started to get even worse, so i told my friend and then he admitted he told the guy i was completely in love with him.
Just to make things worse the day after i found out he knew i liked him, i saw him and this other girl flirting right in front off me it broke my heart completely because i did everything for he and he thought i was just some slut. I felt so bad about myself and what i've done i tock an over dose on some tablets. The next day i found myself in hospital with some of my friends with me. I thought he would show up knowing this happened because of what he did but instead all i got was a text from him saying 'stop making scenes because i could never love you'. My heart shattered and since then about 2 years after i still can't stop thinking about him of love again.