Love is Weak
Remember to tell her everyday how beautiful she is. How much you love her and how proud you are to be seen with her. Talk about her with your friends even if you become the cheesy guy with happy stories. Never make her feel replaceable. Let her know that she is perfect and no one can take her place. Give her the confidence to conquer the world. Talk to her honestly. Never let her feel that the girl that just walked pass is prettier or sexier than her. Or that you think of your ex at all. Let her know that she is the only one you imagine a future with. Listen to her when she talks. Sing her a song even if you know you cant sing to save your life. Find a song with lyrics that speaks the way you feel and let her know which part you dedicate to her. Answer her questions seriously and not just to end the conversation. Be goofy and make her laugh even if you put yourself in embarrassing situations, its her smile that matters. Be her superhero. Let her know that you will take a bullet for her. Don't just say it but prove it with your actions so she knows she is safe with you. Listen to her when that time of month comes around, they are very emotional and need someone to dump all her feelings on. Be strong enough to listen to it all and tell her it will be ok. Give her foot massages just because you know it will make her sleep well. Protect her from everything even if it was a flying cockroach. Be firm. Hold her hand and make it a habit. Remember her favorites. If you cant, write it down in a notebook. Have fun with her and tease her. When you suddenly feel like kissing her or hugging her, do so. No matter when or where. And if she asks why tell her that you just felt like it. Give her surprise notes and small tokens as often as you can. Court her everday. If you're busy, at the end of the day there is always that time when you can send her a flirty text. And when you get lucky, make love to her with a carnivorous passion but treat her like a queen. Be her best friend and her fuck buddy. Love her in every way you know you can. Love her every day, all the time.
And if despite all this she still breaks your heart.. Prepare to feel inadequate. To feel ugly. To feel a hatred for the person that you are. And never look into mirrors because you will see the the face of an unattractive loser. Someone you will hate. That person in the mirror will ask you, "What made you think she would like you? Look at yourself!?" Prepare to feel so small and insecure that your existence in this world doesnt matter. And food would just be something to stop your stomach from grumbling. That laughter is an annoying noise. That the whole world is in monochrome. Like you are riding the midnight train all alone. You will be sad once you wake up. Then mad. Then sad again. Then tired. Then right before you sleep you will fight back the tears because you can imagine how pathetic you look. But sometimes. you just let it all out. Fuck the world. Tears flow. You cant breathe through your nose. You sob. And then again shut yourself up. Get tired and fall asleep. And wish it is a dreamless sleep. The kind of sleep where you are dropped into a void. Ofcourse you wish to never wake up to the sadness anger and pain again. But when the morrow comes. Its there again. The clenching of teeth. The none stop images and questions in your head. Its too much for one to handle. You pray to God for the first time in a long time begging Him to make it stop. Work becomes uninspiring. You find no reason to succeed in life. You hate music now. You hate remembering how it is to hold her hand and laugh with her. When you see couples your upper lip just twitches. You wont even care for friends, books, sex, alcohol or drugs. You just want to dwell in this sadness. Hoping you can exhaust this emotion. Like rolling your soul on a bed of jagged rocks until a callus forms around it so there is no more sensation. You become a bitter soul that really just wants to be saved. Its all over now.. Its done.. Im done.. Im too tired.. .....
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