NOVEMBER 17, 2014 5:42pm
I can hear His whispers. Not hushed speaking, Movements. I can hear Him brush His feet on my living room carpet at night.
I live alone. Not completely. I have Henry here with me, The most lively, clever, stubborn, yet courageous Dachshund of his kind. He helps me sleep at night, when I can feel Him stare.
It’s hard fighting back someone you can’t prove to be real. You almost need to believe in them first. Believe in what they are truly capable of. We fabricate this malice intention we imagine to be lingering around His malevolent silhouette. This is what makes Him so real to me. That is why He plays peek-a-boo from the inside of my closet or at the foot end of my bed.
I need help. God, I need some saving.
“I don’t know. I just can’t fall asleep so easily.” Small talk with my brother.
“Do you leave your television on at night or maybe play on your phone until you fall asleep? I hear little distractions like that will –“
“No. I don’t do any of that. My mind just keeps going. It won’t stop. It won’t shut up.” I hate it when I complain.
“Hennessy. It’ll knock you right out.”
“Ha. Right. Maybe a shot or two just before bedtime and I’ll be out cold. I’ll be good to go.”
“Always remedy for something with you."
“I wouldn’t call alcohol a remedy, you alcoholic. It’s just a formula for the forsaken.”
“Well, I’ll be damned. Talk about, the pot calling the kettle black.”
“The pot can see itself in all things. Especially in kettles so open to reflect who they chose to mirror.”
Smart ass. “Seriously, I’ve tried melatonin, Z-Quil, ibuprofen. None of them work.”
“What do you stay up thinking about anyways?”
The million dollar question. I didn’t want to tell him the truth. It was childish. Truth didn’t belong here anyway. I was only looking for mitigation. “Someone keeps breaking into my house.”
“Yeah, I think it’s a homeless. Nothing ever goes missing. It’s just a mess everywhere. Trash all over the place.”
“Why haven’t you told me? Have you even called the cops?”
“No. I didn’t want to worry you.”
He sighs. “Come sleep over at my place tonight until we can figure something out.”
I got what I wanted. A temporary home. A temporary Band-Aid. And just like any other quick fix, we come back down. Except, when my feet touch the ground once more, I will keep sinking. Far below.
I didn’t mean to involve my brother. He was only acting as any other caring big brother would.