Shell

I can't say I love you,

Not because I don't,

But because it's physically something I cannot do,

The phrase has been ruined for me,

It is hard to explain,

I know what it is supposed to be,

But people have used it as an excuse

To do whatever they want

And justify their abuse,

I wish I could say it I do,

But I never want to make someone feel the way I did,

As though they are trapped

Confined by this phrase like a lid,

I love,

But I cannot force myself to say it

And the guilt grips to me like a glove,

I feel like I'm just a shell

Of the person I was before

I fell,

Broken and empty,

I don't want to be afraid anymore,

I just wish I could say it carefree

I do