Teenage Love

You are the topic of all my conversations

I always bring your name up even If I don’t have to

Even if I shouldn’t

You name and a million other thoughts swirling in my head

I don’t know if I’m dizzy

Or if I’m simply in love…

I try to shake these thoughts out of my head

Because I know that I can not have you

You picked them and not me

I am not upset anymore

But I haven’t quite moved on

You are still the one I want to be near when I need cheering up

You are still the one I want to sit in silence with

You are still the one I want to fall asleep with

You are still the one I want

Yet you do not want me

Why?

I have asked this question over and over again in my head

Why?

Am I not enough?

Why?

Do they have something that I don’t?

Why?

Was I not enough?

Why?

Did you just simply not want me?

Was it me?

Was I the problem?

I feel as though I drove you away

It doesn’t hurt anymore though

But every time I see your face something inside me aches..

I want to know what it is

A hole?

It’s a hole in my heart where you once used to be

I don’t know if it will ever be filled

But maybe one day…

Maybe one day I will stop hurting

Maybe one day I wont think about you anymore

But got now that day will not come

That day will not be soon

You are in my head

You are the topic of all my conversations

I need you to be gone

So, I can finally stop hurting