He knew early on that what he felt wasn’t ‘normal’. He didn’t want to feel like it; didn’t want to have those troubling thoughts that scared him -- yet excited him in ways he didn’t quite understand yet.
He wished he had someone to confide in, someone he could talk to about how he was feeling and what he was thinking, but he was almost afraid to admit to himself what the real problem was. People still didn’t understand the kind of love he wanted.
He was only a teenager, but he was sure that he preferred boys to girls.