The Princess and the Impatient Frog
John Gerard Sapodilla
J J Piglet
We all know how these stories begin. A young Prince goes riding in the woods and meets a witch who asks him to marry her, he rejects the proposal and the witch, in a fit of rage, transforms the Prince into a frog.
At this point, you might believe that the Prince would fall into deep despair being stuck in the middle of the woods, without any idea of where to go and what to do.
However, our Prince knows very well what strategy to implement once you have been transformed into a frog. First, he jumps on his horse and orders the stallion to gallop to the nearest pond. Because even though he has been transformed into frog the Prince still retains the power of speech and as well gets a croak in addition. And, of course, when he arrives at the pond, it is important to make the proper friends.
“How are things here?” The Prince croaks with the airy tone of the candidate who has come to make promises that will help him get elected.
He introduces himself to a group of frogs, that look disenchantedly at the Prince, as if to warn him:
“Don’t dream that you can jump over the rotting leaves, where the best flies linger.”
Frogs are fond of flies. They love shooting out their tongue and make a flying catch of a couple flies. If it was up to them, they would do little else.
The Prince realizes that he has to adapt while waiting for a bypassing princess to kiss him so that he could be transformed back into a Prince. He discreetly asks around and learns with great satisfaction that there are no more Princefrogs in the pond. He needs only to wait for a princess to come to the pond to refresh herself, woo her and whisper sweet nothings in her ear while hopping around her.
Soon, the right Princess arrives, but she does not want to kiss him. Well, at least not for the moment. She tells him that she wants to know him better and carries him off to her garden.
Days go by. Weeks turn into months and still the princess cannot bring herself to kiss the frog. The frog in turn, has lost patience and begins to torment the princess.
“So, Princess. Are you going to kiss me or not?”
The Princess snorts like a coffee machine and shrugs.
“My lips are dry this morning and it is not a good idea that I touch your clammy skin.”
“ You have been delaying for months now. What am I supposed to do, shall I remain a frog forever?”
“Why are you complaining? I put you in a beautiful garden near the goldfish pond. The sun shines on you, you have all kinds of leaves and you even have a rod you can swing on. You have a good life, Mr Frog, believe me. A change is always risky. Turn a frog into a Prince? I don’t think so.”
“Are you crazy? I was there in my pond with my friends. You brought me here after a thousand of promises. Do you recall what you told me? ‘ I will kiss you fine frog, and you will get your hat with feathers and the sword by your side, then we’ll live happily ever after. Happy my ass! And last but not least, your fountain water is not putrid enough, I didn’t want to tell it to you, but you are pushing me towards it.
“What stories are you telling me, frog? It was you who called me, hidden under a leaf in the pond. Pestering me with your goofy voice, like a stick that goes crick crack. Please Princess, kiss me.”
“I was calling you to be kissed. I was not supposed to be dragged here to become your plaything. I am a frog Prince, not a house cat.”
“Stop complaining and do not ever ask me again. You are ungrateful. And I was thinking of entering you into a jumping competition. Can you imagine? Should you win, the king himself would reward you. You would sit at the head of His table, a little crown on your head, and, who knows, receive a small life annuity. You would green reed that grows so fast and only a happy few can hear in the deep night; the broad and muddy wet leaves and the song of a thousand creatures doing background vocals in the sunset. He left all of that for a stupid garden trimmed with scissors. Betrayed by his ambition.come back to me as a winner, my little hero.”
“Then, when will you kiss me?”
“I don’t know… Maybe tomorrow. Your persistence annoys me.”
The Princess has already made up her mind, she will never kiss the frog. She has in mind the letters of her Princess-friends, full of complaints about the Princes they married. It would be really an unjustified and reckless decision to kiss the frog, just so he could be transformed back into a Prince.
The frog realizes his miserable destiny. He feels frozen. Such are Princesses, selfish, cunning and deceitful women. The poor frog feels lost, a prisoner forever. He should have never left his pond; the russeling of the green reed that grows so fast and only a happy few can hear in the deep night; the broad and muddy wet leaves and the song of a thousand creatures doing background vocals in the sunset. He left all of that for a stupid garden trimmed with scissors. Betrayed by his ambition.