The Quantum Mechanic

Dr. Maximillan Williams is some kind of brilliant;
Too bad he has to, in fact, be a villain.

In his classes he was always the quietest,
Lost in deep thoughts about the sciences,
Perpetually tinkering with newfangled appliances,
Never the least bit interested in social alliances,
Voted by his peers:
MOST LIKELY TO NEED A PSYCHIATRIST

"This great big world I see --
It's not everything, is it?"
Asked young Max to himself;
So he set about to find out
All he could about quantum physics.

So quick to learn,
His teachers did discern,
As they witnessed his mind churn;
He seemed destined and headed
On a collision course with CERN.

But somewhere along the way,
Something went horribly amiss;
The curious student of Nature
Transitions into evil scientist.

While writing a paper on Quantum MECHANICS,
His nefarious neurons had a thought --
(Genius but also quite satanic)
Why didn't he open his own auto body shop?

"If I look and act the part,
Pretending I can tend to cars,
I'll project an image
Of being honest and fair;
Then folks will bring me
Their vehicles for repair.

I can call the ruse MOTOR CORTEX,
It's a clever pun;
Inside I'll create a quantum vortex --
He he, this should be fun!

I'll convert engines into inimical inventions,
Spinning wheels into diminutive dimensions.

That kooky Doc Brown
And his flux capacitor?
Ha! My auto tweak --
Worlds more spectacular.

As the maniacal molecule manipulator,
I'll give new meaning to particle ACCELERATOR --
When unsuspecting drivers step on the gas,
Into the quantum realm they will pass.

Who needs a weapon
That's astronomic
When I can make victims
Go subatomic?"

Ever since the fiendish genius
Went all loco and psychopathic,
There's been a tragic and drastic
Decrease in the streets of traffic.

Speculation runs rampant,
As does the chatter:
Mass alien abduction?
Or something biblical --
The Rapture?
But in that sort of scenario,
Who could the cops capture?

It will be a while
Before Maximillan's brought to trial;
Meanwhile he'll smirk and smile
While teleporting motorists
Into quantum exile.

Perhaps the worst kind of devil
Is the one who can bedevil
On the molecular level.

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