I was staring off at the pouring rain, it was cold and dark in my room. My dad walked in. “What do you want,” I said sarcastically.
“Don’t take that tone with me, young lady, what do you want for dinner?”
“Whatever is good. But I hate tomatoes so don't give me any”
“You can't avoid them forever”
“WELL MAYBE I CAN YOU DON'T KNOW ME! YOU WERE NEVER THERE FOR ME” I snapped back at him. My father was abusive to my mum and was almost never home with us. He had alcohol issues and when my mother or I needed him, he was never there.
“Fine, no dinner till you can learn to respect me. I’m not your mother… no matter how much you miss her we can’t bring her back.”
“DON’T YOU DARE TALK ABOUT HER! YOU WERE NEVER THERE FOR US! YOU NEVER EVEN VISITED AND YOU EXPECT ME TO TRUST YOU!!!” I shouted in anger and frustration. I was in tears thinking back to my mother's death. It was a great day, we had gone to the park and aquarium. We went to go get ice cream. She was driving us home and a car hit us. I watched her dying beside me. “MUM! WAKE UP! DON'T LEAVE ME!”
“Sweetie….. Don't cry…. I lov….” She was gone. That was only a couple months ago.
“I’ll see you tomorrow. Maybe you will feel better” said my dad leaving my room, and just like that, he left.
“I hope you die,” I said through my bitter tears. I curled up in my red and black blanket my mother gave me the fell asleep.
It was 7:00 and I heard my dad knock on my door to wake me up. “Wake up kiddo it’s time for breakfast. Then our daily train ride into the city to get to therapy.”
“Alright be there in a sec dad,” I said grumbling. I got up and went to my drawer to put on my blue skinny jeans and my black nirvana shirt my mother gave me. I walked out and smelt pancakes and syrup… my favorite! Hmm, that’s a surprise, dad knows what I like I thought to myself.
“How’d you sleep?” He asked me.
“I don't know… with pain and sorrow because I lost the only person who cares about me?” I replied still, bitter about last night.
“That is no way to treat your father, so learn to behave. I am trying to change myself as a person, so try NOT to make it so hard for me,” he replied.
“Whatever” I retorted, scoffing at his comment. We ate our pancakes in silence. After breakfast, I went to the apartment door to put on my black converse sneakers to walk to the train station to see my best friend, the conductor. His name was James, and he and my mother were friends. We would bring him cookies and sweets and food, or gifts that my mother and I would make. Today I was going to bring him a necklace my mother and I made for him before she died. The necklace had a little train and beads on it.
“Let’s get a move on my sweet princess,” my dad said.
“Alright let's go,” I said shoving the necklace into my pocket. We walked a good five blocks before we reached the station. I had zoned out so I didn't know if my dad was talking or not. I saw James and ran up to him with a smile on my face. He picked me up and spun me around. As soon as he put me down I pulled out the necklace from my pocket. “I hope you like it,” I said with glee
“I love it,” said James “How you doing kiddo?”
“I'm in a bit of an argument with Mr.Dad over there but whatever.”
“Well don't waste time with the one in your life” he suggested.
“I know I know but he was never there for me so... Oh hey, I have to go so I’ll see you after the train ride. Bye!” I scurried off.
“Come one sweetie let's sit down,” My dad said. We sat down in our normal seats. I put in my ear buds to ignore my dad. An hour or so went by, then I heard screaming. I looked out the window in confusion trying to see what the commotion was about. I gasped when I saw what had happened. The rainstorm had caused a landslide which took out the tracks! The train was plummeting to the ground. Our train car was next. “HELP!, I'M SORRY DAD FOR HOW I HAVE BEEN TREATING YOU” I screamed through my frighten tears.
“I’M SORRY TOO, I LOV…” he tried saying but the train crashed. He was gone too.
Later I woke up in the hospital, where am I, I thought to myself. Suddenly everything came flooding back. I had no one, and nowhere to go. It was all my fault. I pulled off my sheets to see I had a broken leg. Not too bad, I thought to myself. I hobbled along sneakily to the roof of the hospital. I stood on the edge “1...2...3” I whispered.