To the Missing Mother

Dear Maa,

I have cried thousands tears for failing you so forgive me now and set me free. I can't go on like this. It comes to eat me at weired hours of the night. I haven't slept peacefully in ages. And I don't remember last time when I was happy at heart. I don't have anyone to talk to and I'm alone with my burden and my heart aches. So please tell me that it's okay. It's ok to stop feeling guilty. Maa tell me so that it leaves my heart , please.

I'm so tired feeling alone. I know I couldn't be the daughter you needed, I couldn't be the adult which was required of me. But please forgive me. Maa I miss you. I miss our phone conversation and all our disagreements. I know you are in peace now because I see you each night with a bright face and smiling back at me. Everything is just the same like you had left except your touch around our home.

Maa please forgive me so that I can go about my life with less hurt and pain. Please. I keep playing your voice in my phone, and I know I'm lucky that I can still hear your happy voice but Maa , i need to do something to move on. And I can't do that feeling guilty for how things went down so I need you to tell me that it's okay. It's okay that I couldn't do enough. Please set me free.

Please.

Author Notes: Because when tears fail you, all you are left with are words. Uncertainty itself is so uncertain that you would be surprised at how life changes. Love the ones you keep close and while you still can. Tomorrow it might not be there.

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