To My Dearest

Dear unforbidden lover,

I've stopped the lies,and convicing myself otherwise.

I know now what I feel, is real and unforgiving.

I know I am only a friend, and you have someone new.

Could I keep being your friend if you knew what I knew?

Dear forbidden lover,

I've learned to admire you from a distance for I know you are happy with someone who isn't me. Your a flirt, horrible in more ways than one, unstable, broken,.....lost. My brain knowing, I cannot take the risk, but to my heart you're all i've ever wanted.

I no longer wish, beg, or pray for I have tried far too many times, each time over come with dissapointment. Even if one day I have forgotten you, I will never forget this feeling......

The feeling of helplessness, love, anger and the regret I will feel later on. Regret that I wasn't selfish enough to care about what I wanted, regret that I let it happen, regret that I let you walk away, regret that I never told you I felt that way. I'm glad we're just friends but sad thats all we'll ever be. I love that you're happy, hope thats all you'll ever need.

Keep me in your life thats all i've wanted, I'll be at your wedding sometime in the future, I admit it will be torture. As long as you're happy I will love you all the same. Please stay alive if not for me for him. Don't leave your story unwritten,

To my dearest forbidden goodbye......

Author Notes: I wrote this out of my own feelings at the time and now. I was confused with my sexuality, because I had a crush on the opposite gender. At the time they already had a partner and at first it didn't matter to me, but I soon give up. Though, I still continue to write them letters. There are more of the letters but I loved these two the most.

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