United Kingdom • 16 y/o • FemaleReviews Received
A gorgeous piece of writing. You did an incredible job, as always! I can't describe how thankful I am for you, Had!
The horrible tragedy of losing someone without getting to tell them you love them. It hurts. More than words can describe. But you captured that pain and wrote it down into words. Good job!
Interesting. I wonder what number 7 is referring to. You did a great job! I love how you wrote in lowercase, it gives the writing a more nonchalant feel, even if it's about death.
This was very well written! I liked the rhythm of it, and I liked some of the devices you used to convey your message.
My main recommendation would be perhaps going back through and switching up some word order or choice to make the rhythm and meter more smooth and consistent. A couple of examples/suggestions are changing "There once was a murder" for "Once there was a murder", and "Just like most murders" for something like "Just as in most murders" or "Like any other murder".
All in all, great work! I hope that you didn't draw too much from personal experience to write this.
You did really well on this, cannot wait to see more of your work.
This is a beautiful heartfelt poem. Your words do a great job of conveying these complex emotions. If you need someone to talk out your emotions with, reach out any time. :)
This is so sad :( I hope you're doing alright. I'm here to talk if you wanna, just remember that.
The poem was really good, though! I love how you said that the father was a hero. That really put the oomph in it. I love how it's a story-poem, where the poem tells a story. You're very talented!
Wow, how intense-
I didn't think it would escalate that quickly!
Maybe separate the paragraphs a bit more. It's harder to read the first few paragraphs because of how mixed up they are. Other than that, you did really well!