Hobo

All I can say is "wow". Reminds me of early work by Richard Matheson. Keep at it!

I just signed up today and thought I'd read a story or two. Your story is the first I chose.

I don't condone astrology either, but I thoroughly enjoyed The Visitor.
It was light, humorous, and refreshing.

I rarely give 5 stars.

It's a very meanngful poem which (poetically) makes us realise how bad times have become. Time flies...

I kind-of enjoy your thought processes, which entertain most of the time. At times though, for me, 'less is more' could be the order of the day in some of your work. This particular poem goes on a tad too long for its own good, which is a pity as it is otherwise really good. As I said, my opinion only :-)

well versed ink, thanks for the read

This was sweet, thank you for sharing.

This is a much better and nicer story to read than some of your other work due to the minimal use of 'fancy' language. It has a nice flow and fairly good drama, too. I'm not so sure all the stuff with her mother serves any purpose in the story: it feels unnecessary and out-of-place somehow. You could have got to where you are in the story without it...

Hopefully you have ideas to develop this story? It would be interesting to see where you take it. There is certainly plenty of scope to take it in many different directions.

One small note of caution: please keep your story description to a minimum. You tend to tell too much before folks get to read the story.

Oh, and Kat is the LAST person to be giving advice about grammar, spelling etc. Just check her comment: TWO spelling mistakes ('discription' for 'description' and 'Micheals' for 'Michael's') and a grammar error ("But one reminded" instead of 'reminder')! How's THAT for embarrassing oneself??

You are doing no worse and considerably better than some others...