IanG

That's a good twist Apurbo. Keep writing.

There was a lump in my throat as I read the ending.

The wave metaphore is a good one.
Most people are going through big changes at eighteen, whether its university or your first job. Its understandable to feel worried about that. Just because things are rough now it doesn't mean they always will be. If one plan or ambition doesn't work out then another one might. The pandemic is making things hard now, but sooner or later society will come to terms with it. it may not be easy but if people couldn't get past crisis our species would've gone extinct long before now.

There was a recession when I was a teenager. Sometimes it seemed it would never end but it did. I was unemployed for a time but I found a good job, even though it took me years.

The sun metephore is good. Sometimes I Iwake up feeling strong emotions from a dream yet can't recall the details of it

You've worked hard on this, researching the historical background and using your imagination well. I'm glad its doing well.

This is a thoughtful piece that will resonate with many people. Crisis often cause us to question what we once took for granted: the Black Death shook the feudal system; both world wars lead to women and subjects of empires demanding equality with male Caucasians. This pandemic may yet have a similar effect.

You're right about the corrosive effects of guilt. There's a little more hope here than in some of your pieces, and that's good.

Its possible to learn from a bad experience and so avoid repeating it. If you meet another worthless boy you'll spot danger signs sooner and, I hope, back off before it gets that bad.

There's a lot of bad advice out there when it comes to relationships. Some people share only the good times and cover up the bad. Others have a vested interest in putting other people down. It doesn't have to be like the relationship you describe but some would like you to think there's no alternative. If you meet someone like your ex again, hold out for someone better. There's plenty of time for him to come along.