IanG

I enjoyed this story. It soon became clear how it would end, but you evoke the narrator and the animals very well. Most pet owners will relate to it.

There's no shame in being afraid or worried from time to time, but we musn't let it take over our lives. I'm s grown man and I worry at times. Only idiots never worry at all, but its possible to have bad times and come out the other side.

I like the descriptions of Everist, you've done well there. You could've added details of how Hillary was feeling, like aching legs or gasping for breath. When he makes it try saying he felt exhilerated or triumphant. Back then he might have been discouraged from showing emotions but he could still have felt them deep inside himself.

If this is inspired by a berevement in real life then I feel for you. My mother passed away a few years ago and it was terrible for me. You learn to cope but part of you will miss het for a long time.

You describe the setting very well and your narrator's experiences are convincing. I'd have written "where an elderly couple grazed a mule" or "kept a mule" as they owned it wherever it was. Otherwise, well done.

You describe Zaire's feelings and the setting very well. This raises a lot of questions about the characters and their culture, but if you're planning on developing it furthet that's good. Keep writing.

I lke the metaphore of the fist and the whole poem is evocative. Good work.

You sum up the Earl beautifully with just a few words. Well done.