IanG

You evoke the human characters very well. You also describe the birds and the setting vividly. There are people like Dobson, and people like Arthur. A clash ending in violence is quite possible.

You evoke the characters and the setting with great skill. The clash of values rings true.

Fresh flowers that smell etherial, brought in from the garden" reads better than "fresh flowers brought in from the garden that smell etherial." Otherwise your descriptions are excellent. A simple story but beautifully told.

The frustrations you're describing are quite common for writers and other people too. That doesn't make it all right but it means people can do their best and carry on despite the issues. The clay metaphore is good.

A lot of writers feel like this at times. I sometimes do. For a recent story I wstched a documentary about lifeboat crews, then used a similat scenario in my story 'Dark Midwinter Night.' The story took a respectable number of hits but not as many as some of mine and not as many as I hoped for. Pethaps I didn't convey all I wanted to. What do other people think?

If I'd been a conscript, I'm pretty sure I'd have been the guy who got killed by his own grenade.

If this is based on fact, remembet there are bettet people around than the one who left you. It may seem unlikely now but its true.

I like the metaphore of the first asdignment
It wouldn't have occured to me but now you mention it, its a good one.