Australia • 69 y/oReviews Received
"Tbe few customers until the upcoming dinner time."
Try "there were only a few customers between now and dinner time" it flows a bit better.
You describe the characters very well. I like Joey finding wonder in small tbings.
You wrote some good banter and an exciting rescue scene. Well done.
Gotta say I never had that red "romantic magic marker" on any sheet, nor did I want that either.
A fine story indeed.
Oh dang!...
That's a hell of an ending.
Reminds me of the movie Mother! with Jennifer Lawrence and Javier Bardem. But the movie is very much symbolism whereas your story is direct with a little extra 'filler' moments to add spice and wholeness to it.
Not too shabby of a writing.
I like the quips and the descriptions of snow and festivities. I wouldn't comment on their talking a man out of suicide as, thankfully, I've no experience of that. I suspect that what works in one case might not in another. Overall its a good story.
A true classic, and closer to a masterpiece than I will ever get myself.
``WHEN YOU NEED HELP THAT NO ONE ELSE CAN PROVIDE, RIDE THE WAVES OF THE PSYCHIC TIDE!´´ - Quote from the story.
Knowing the time before Blair Witches and faked-found-footage: A solid story on the clashing of the rational approach, as police and private investigators work it, and the Intuitive approach of the often deceptive, or outright fraudulent, psychics!
A long story as well, with zero flaws on grammar or format. Thanks for sharing!
