lemonslice

I'm always amazed when a full story can be told within 1000 words. This is a real nugget of a story. Well done!

Not friends with Robert Rankin, are you? :)

I really enjoyed this poem and I'm usually not a poetry person.

This is an awesome little vignette. What I liked about it was the level of emotions you managed to pack into short space.

Think about two things when you write short fiction like this:

* Dialogue punctuation.
* What POV are you writing from?

I love micro fiction because of stories like this one. The first line sounds very differently when read a second time. :)

Keep up the writing!