I appreciated the minimalism and honesty of the topic. I hope you wrote it to 'wrestle your inner demons' or for transparencies sake, as being sick of this life has become pretty common in this new age of emotionally crippled narcissists and online-trolls.
You could decide for more creative figures of speech, but if you feel it is right, as it is, then keep it that way.
Thanks for sharing. Oh, and I could add that 'I burn to ashes' is one option, still I know that 'Ashes' are a sort of trees. So one could burn like a dried ash... ;-)
With the fuss which was made about my stories, format, punctuation, and readability I was pretty surprised that other authors are not checked at all.
'The dimming of the light' makes it harder to read, as it does not separate the story text from dialogues, and I don't wish to read 30 more parts presented that way.
Contextually the chapter is too short, as it barely gives me a scene and plot to imagine before it ends. The trick is to make the readers want to read more, not to declare a single page a chapter.
As I did not voluntarily review this I give 4 stars anyway.
Thanks for sharing.
The prose and format are pretty good, and were appreciated. Sadly I did not only find the overdose of aliens & superpowers to lower the value aka quality of it, but got a bit bored by the lengthy intro.
For some reason I got the intuitive hint at 'Jack the Ripper' early on, and I had the feeling I had read this story before.
Invincible killers who get away with everything, just like invincible vigilantes who are never really endangered, can reduce the thrill of a story.
To me this is a 3 star story at the very best, but it being the first I read on this website I assign 4 stars.