TheForgotten

The story in itself was good. There were parts when commas were missing and some where a period was needed but overall the grammar was good. Word choice was a tad over done, while a large word here and there is good and adds to the story many of them can often times make the sentence a little choppy. Overall a job well done

Whoa. This story is great. I really would like to see where this is going to lead. Great work!

The story itself was good, and cute. I noticed a few errors in the story though, which can be easily fixed. Very cute little story!

I love the idea of this story. It's unique and I believe it had a message. Just a side not but in pativular parts the story would get a little sloppy. Otherwise I really liked this peice.

I've been keeping track of this series and the ending of this scene just blew my mind. I can't wait for the next one!

Personally I feel like this is more of a horror since it involves murder, but it just depends on how you look at it.

It's actually a rather good point that you bring up, I hadn't even thought about it before reading this.

Aw, what a lovely little tale. I really enjoyed this story. There were a couple of errors here and there, but nobody is perfect. Beautifully written, and a job well done.