United States • 21 y/o • MaleReviews Given
Very emotional. Very immersive. You're probably getting annoyed with these five stars, but honestly, "good" just doesn't cut it
Jolene is a party in the worst way possible. 0/10
...
Well. This is satisfying.
I love it.
Still like this.
Easily my favorite part of the story so far. It flows better, and the dialogue was fun and showed the characters' personalities nicely.
I'm excited for the rest.
So, there are lots of issues in the world, and the climate change argument is definitely one of them. The thing is, people with political agendas will lie about pretty much anything if it gets them what they want, and real scientists have actually gone unheard on this topic for a long time, because what they say doesn't fit their agenda.
Obviously the lyrics to this song aren't separating the issue from politics, I mean, the name Trump is in there. It's obviously political, which is the first issue. When things become political, we often let facts fall by the wayside, which is a huge problem, because if we can't see the problem from a neutral standpoint, coming up with a solution is gonna be impossible.
Second mistake was being on Tik Tok.... No offence, but I've never seen more stupidity in one place before.
Love the feather visuals. Love the atmosphere. Word choice is kinda flowery, but not bad by any means.
I will say, we spent a strange amount of time talking about mushrooms, and it feels very different from the rest of the story. At the end, it says "Before they knew it, they were inseparable friends", but we didn't see that process (which is fine, because the story is going to be relatively short, and you can't show everything) but we DID see mushrooms, which left me confused.
Maybe I missed something that gives the mushrooms meaning. Maybe I'm too hung up on them. Either way, I like the tone of this, and the pictures you chose have the cold, airy, but still stable vibe of the story.
To be clear, I actually like the mushroom conversation (except for the obnoxious technical names) but I do question its necessity in this story. Ya gots ta be intentional about what you show, and if we're hung up on plants while brushing by character development, it can leave the reader feeling cheated.