Underwood1090

I'm going to semi agree but also disagree with the other commenter. Most stories have already been told in some form or fashion, so it's hard to create original material. Most of the time we are just telling our on version of a similar story. Not that we necessarily base our stories off of it, but every story has a close cousin. As a writer, you need to make sure you use correct English, syntax, subject verb agreement, etc. I find some of your writing distracting due to errors. Your character had a little voice, which is great! I find it by him addressing the pile of mail and such, which works well. It seems like he is describing it and not you writing about it, so good job! I know as a writer, it is hard to post your work, but I like constructive criticism, so I give it. Keep writing, good luck!