Why Me?

There I lay crying mascara filled tears into a stuffed bear. Waterfalls of hot tears rolled down my flushed cheeks as I took in what had happened. My mother told me not to cry but I wasn't going to listen to some old woman that sat around all day watching soap operas. She would sit there in her rose room on her linen white sheets eyes glued to an old TV screen. She could have a rainbow of emotions just in 30 minutes watching her shows. I was most of the time busy and working usually trying to make enough money for my family. I almost always was serious or content but today I was mad one minute then pouring all of my feelings into my tears that landed on a poor old valentines day bear. That day I figured out my husband was cheating on me. I didn't say anything I just turned a corner and there he was making out with another girl right in front of my eyes. I didn't say anything I just stood there motionless letting the reality seep through my whole body. What was there to say? He turned around and I will never forget the look on his face. He had promised to pick me up that day so I wouldn't have to take the filthy crowed crammed bus. But when I walked around that corner he was not alone.

My room was a mess of broken pictures and anything and everything tossed around like a wild monkey had been held captive in it. Lipstick and mascara smears and stains covered the white plush bear my ex husband-Travis had gotten me. The bear was soaked through and through with tears and emotions,like you had left it outside in a rainstorm. I just couldn't wrap my mind around the idea that Travis had been with another girl behind my back this whole time. He had probably been hooking up with her for months now. We had 3 children together and both of our jobs combined barely covered the expenses of the kids plus the house and all of the bills. How would I ever do it alone? Tomorrow I would go to try and get full custody of the kids but could I do it. But I couldn't leave them with their trash bag of a father. My mind was to full to think about that right now. I slurped the rest of my instant noodles and let sleep find me.

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