AaronTheRocker

I'd say this is pretty chillaxed. I like it. Simple and neat, but still puts a little flame in our heart.

Yo, I love the movie Ghost. Finely written.

Like the concept. Old-time feel of a good cliche. It's like Little House on The Prairie style.
Overall, great. With the sequencing of events and how you described them, they seem cut-off. Instead of a steady consistent flow, it is stop-and-go in some areas. Not to much, but recognizable, at least in my opinion.

I know I'm not your 'lover', but I gotta say something.

"I don't do drugs, but I'm addicted to you." reminds me of the song "Addicted" by Le Mans. Total 80s Hard Rock. Except their song is more... sexualized.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhaLh1CGFPw

"Expect the worst, hope for the best."
"Prepare for war, but hold your gun at ease."
"Just because you don't see the enemy that doesn't mean they don't see you."

That's what this poetry reminds me of. It also reminds me of 'The Warning'. An album from 1984 by Queensryche.

Oh dang!...
That's a hell of an ending.

Reminds me of the movie Mother! with Jennifer Lawrence and Javier Bardem. But the movie is very much symbolism whereas your story is direct with a little extra 'filler' moments to add spice and wholeness to it.

Not too shabby of a writing.

Ah, the ocean.
For someone who has thalassophobia, such as myself, this would be a nightmare situation. And this correlates well with someone who may fall off the beaten trail mentally. Get a little too curious, anxious or overwhelmed, then all of a sudden it goes down hill.

Sadly, but naturally, it's the innocence of time.