I'm confused, why is this bad? Its well written and i actually felt something which is hard for me normally. I didn't catch any major errors and for 14 this is really good. Great Job! Keep writing.
Well you answered the first question
It flows well and tells of a tragedy and it seems the depression resulting from it
I happen to know well the depression you mention
I've read this 3 times now and can't find anything i would change at all. Good Job.
And I do have to ask is the person you?
Well... I guess first is this true?
If so thank god for people like you
If not you are an extremely descriptive writer. I felt nearly everything you said and I have really bad empathy for others.
Regardless of weather or not this story is true you did a really great job and I hope you are doing well now and in the future.
For the story: it is great! Not much else to say there
For your issue if it still is a thing: Why do you hate yourself? I won't tell you think happy you've tried but attempt to find the source. It sorta seems like it comes from comparing your self to others. Regardless great story!
It is great,for changes that I personally would make it would be erasing the third line. That is just me though and for 12 years old this is really good. Keep it up!
Its great the story not the depression or loss for that matter. Yeah I get your feeling on depression and the whole thing flows nicely.
During your free time? This is really good,the pacing of it is really nice cause you don't need to think much and it flows really smooth.Great job!
This was well written and I kind of have to ask
Did this happen to you? Its hard to tell over text if such a thing did or didn't and it does affect the impact of the reading some,well might just be me.