United States • 22 y/o • FemaleReviews Received
It's a pretty good poem from what I can tell. It's a bit sad, but I think that's what makes it
it's a very good story as a start
What instantly sprung to my mind was "is there really nothing I can do? Is there nothing people can do to help others?"
And sometimes, there isn't anything. But other times, there are ways, even if they're just small things, to better other people's lives.
There were definitely some grammatical errors and spelling, as well as punctuation, but that can be fixed with some adjustments. I can tell this kind of fantasy story is something you like to indulge yourself in and somehow relate to, so that intrigues me a lot. It does seem a bit predictable but I also haven't read the next part yet, so maybe I'll be wrong :) overall, the story line is something of a typical teenage broken outcast surrounded by beautiful people- it may do some good to point out imperfections in the characters and talk about those things to add some more dynamic to the story. I am, however, enticed to read part two!
Simple and raw. Very honest and pure with some kind of lingering fire. I, too, am familiar with these family dynamics- just know you're never alone, someone out there is rooting for you and you wouldn't even know.