IanG

You say a lot with a few words. Its moving and convincing. I like the phrase 'when the leaves loose grip.'

You've expressed what a lot of young peope feel at your age. I don't have a nice easy answer but I'll say this. You're not alone, some people set standards for others that few if any of us measure up to, and kindness, intelligence and creativity matter as well as what you look like.

I like your descriptions of the characters and of the setting. If I'd written it I'd have tried to prepare for the twist without giving too much away.

I'd mention a small ball lying in a corner of the sitting room. Voss could think the old lady has a granchild who called and forgot to take the ball home. Then at the end she says "Arthur's not my husband, he's my cat. That's his ball in the corner." That prepares for the twist without making it too obvious.

The captain stealing Vosse's thunder rings true.
.

Thanks for sharing this Willie. I know it makes no difference now but I hope your ancestor was reunited with his family

My mother passed away when I was in my 50s and that was hard enough. It must be worse loosing her when very young yourself. I've learned to get by without her, it took time and help from friends but it can be done. Its hard but possible. I hope you come to terms with your loss.

This is a vivid evocation of a more innocent time. A lot of mature people will relate to it. Well done.

You evoke the knight's mental state very well, I felt sorry for him. If you develop this further, you could describe soldiers in industrial age armies reaction to the knight. They would be shocked and bewildered by his appearence.

People can be affected in the way you evoke here. The thing is people don't always show us everything about themselves. Someone can present a perfect image of themselves, at school, work or on social media and have issues or setbacks they don't talk about. Don't think you're alone in failing to measure up.