United States • 22 y/o • MaleReviews Received
hi, your choice of words is good and the way you built up the story was amazing. I like your story. waiting for your continuation.
I loved this!! I love the detail and everything else about this story! Good job
Do you plan to make this more of a suspense Fantasy? I feel like when someone is writing a suspense or a more "dark" story the descriptions that weave themselves into the story are key.
In answer to your question about Lli's irrational assumptions about his parents' deaths, it might be cause to the fact that we as people(regardless of our class, since this seems to play no role in our ability to rationalize) have a tendency to find a reason for everything. We are constantly looking to place a label or reason on everything so that we can better comprehend it. So in sence, it would seem that Lli is so shocked about this traumatic event, that he abandoned any rational conclusions(emotions tend to cloud all rational thoughts, which seems to be why many characters would seek revenge) and was simply trying to come to a conclusion that makes sense to him, wich in this case is that there HAS to be a "reason" for their deaths.
I think it's amusing, it definitely shows a lot about you. And in remark to your comment below your title, I should have you know that NO story is a waste of time. And can be later built upon or even viewed by a reader as creative and something they NEVER would have thought of themselves. I also thought the jump between the point of view of the story being written within your story to the author in your actual story, was an interesting element that definitely added to your story.
