Andy (Formerly Apemann)

There is an underlying bitterness in your words that suggests that your 'best friend' is perhaps not the sort of friend you want..?

Although not strictly a story (a work of fiction) this was a well-presented piece. I hope you'll send us more of your work very soon.

This is an interesting poem, but please take care with your wording. This sentence - "Cause she comes from such afar" - is grammatically incorrect and the word 'such' is unnecessary. Overall a good job :-)

Take care with your spelling and punctuation. It spoils your work.

Whilst this is an interesting story, there are faults with it. had you used your computer's spell-check and thesaurus facility many of the small errors would have been highlighted for you to correct.

Another interesting submission - but take care. It is not good practice to use numerals in prose: numbers should be written in full. Similarly, abbreviations are also not acceptable. Thus, '32' should be written 'thirty-two'. Your computer's spell-check and thesaurus facility will help you to avoid these minor issues in future works.

An interesting submission - but take care with your work. It is spoiled a little by your lack of attention to detail. Use your computer's spell-check and thesaurus to avoid unnecessary grammar, spelling and punctuation errors. DO keep writing, though!

This story is not without faults, but overall it works well.

Although your story breaks the 'rules' of writing, understanding what you were trying to achieve with this work makes it permissible to break those rules in this instance. Well done!