Andy (Formerly Apemann)

This was good... until the punctuation error on the third-last line marred it... ('im' for I'm)

Take a little more care with your punctuation. A nice poem.

This is an interesting poem, but please take care with your wording. This sentence - "Cause she comes from such afar" - is grammatically incorrect and the word 'such' is unnecessary. Overall a good job :-)

MUCH better! However, there are still one or two silly punctuation errors. PLEASE use your computer's spell checker! A great improvement. Well done :-)

There are some punctuation errors in this piece but it is generally okay. Please take time to check your work thoroughly before submitting.

Take care with your spelling and punctuation. It spoils your work.