United Kingdom • 25 y/o • FemaleReviews Received
Poor grammar and dialogue punctuation is hampering your work. Please make sure that you spell-check before posting. It only comes across as lazy otherwise, and you don't want that.
What should have been a pleasure to read was spoiled because the story is riddled with spelling and grammatical mistakes.
Take time to CHECK your work before submitting it. Your computer has spell-check and thesaurus facilities: use them!
On the plus side, there is a budding story-teller in you. Iron-out the clumsiness - and laziness! - and you will become a fine writer.
I liked this. Dark poems are my favorite but towards the end you could of add a little bit more so the last stanza would have a better impact on the readers.
You have all the elements of darkness in your story I feel it was a nicely penned good job.
write more!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I like it.... It's iverall a good story with deep emotion. Although it felt like some of your sentences were very short. Almost fragments. But other then that I love it! Great job!