IanG

As in part one, the descriptions are vivid and you build suspense well.

I like your description of the door, and the idea of currents in a room is interesting. You should've had a capital S at the start of Spanish, but overall this is good.

This is an impressive piece for such a young writer. I can believe in your narrator and the plea for reconcilliation is heartfelt.

You are right in saying that problems don't end when the war is won. A lot of fantasy stories are based on that assumption, but it seldom works like that in real life.

Eden goes from being overpowered to killing everyone rather quickly. If he's trying to fight his way to your narrator but it takes him time to reach her, that's more consistent.

A lot of people will relate to this. Music can help us to release powerful emotions when nothing else does.

This is difficult subject matter but you handle it with courage and honesty. If you want to write another chapter, yes do it.

Coming from a country where the weather is notoriously fickle, I can relate to this. Well done.

This is a moving and thoughtful piece, I enjoyed it. It didn't need to be scary.