IanG

Interesting account of how people view animals in different ways. We often impose our prejudices on many species, but we're not always right and it won't change the creatures in question. Both rats and snakes do what they must to survive in what can be harsh environments.

You're drawing readers in by describing their sadness but not yet explaining the reason for it. With 'Anyway Back' there should be a lower case 'b' in 'back,' but more practice should fix issues like that.

If Cal tries to stand up to his mother but she won't stop objecting, that would be more plausible than if he gives in immediately. It creates a bit more tension too.

Credit where its due, you've improved the story since you put an earlier version of it online.

If we all got upset every time something bad happened in the world, we would loose our sanity. You're not a bad person if you can't tackle every issue. Dealing with the present lockdown is a new experience even for adults. Is it any wonder a lot of people find it hard to handle. Don't break the law, this lockdown won't last forever, it can't or economies all over the world will crumble. Surely no government run by sentinent adults will allow that.

I hope things improve for you soon.

If social media had existed back then, Jesus and the Apostles probably would've used it. So too would Socrates, the Buddha and Confucius had it been available to them. People wrote propaganda and biased accounts long before the first computer or the first smartphone.

Please take this as constructive criticism, as this is good for such a young writer.

Why does he ask "did someone live here twenty years ago?" He would more likely say "who lived here before us?" He must know they didn't build the house themselves, and if not then obviously someone lived there before them. The question is who were they? Mum could say in reply exactly when the last occupants left.

You have an interesting premise but the story needs more working on. If you broke it up into paragraphs then it would be easier to read. Then again, paragraphs can merge by mistake when you put a story online, its happened to me.

You raise some important issues regarding peer group pressure and prejudice. Keep practising and you'll improve.

Try writing 'he was proud that I'd been promoted to Principle' or something like that. Her partner already knows she's been promoted and where she works, he probably wouldn't state the obvious. In films and T.V. characters sometimes spell out what they must already know, for the viewer's benefit. In a story you don't need to, you can say that with an inner monologue or, in a first person narration, narrator addressing reader directly.