United States • 22 y/oReviews Received
This is so cute and sweet, such talent to but the details of how much you love her! Keep up the work!
Omg, me and my best friend was reading this together, and was freaked out, we even said if we saw a doll on the road we’d be gone as fast as we can, keep up the work! I love this story!!
Very simple and to the point. I think you did a good job. There's a point where you wrote "March" when I think you meant "much", but otherwise, I think it's pretty good.
We are surrounded by images of people who are physically perfect. It puts a lot of pressure on us to measure up. Try to remember celebrities have a lot of help from make up artists and even personal trainers. Teenagers in films are often portrayed by twenty somethings. Photos can even be airbrushed. Most of us are not so lucky. Just because you don't look like your favourite singer or actor, it doesn't make you a failure.
I love you! I will always be here for you and thank you for this!
The twist is good and took me by surprise. Just one thing, a twist needs to be prepared for without giving too much away. If your narrator says, while making up, that she seldom gets a chance to relax or have fun it implies that she has a tough job. If as you imply she goes undercover in dangerous situations, it anticipates the twist but holds some information back. Keep it up.
Wow! I was not expecting that twist at the end! This is a great story!! Great job!!
I have a couple of people in my family who have the same mental thing going on... just keep trying and push through this. I believe anyone can do it. I know it's hard I sorta understand. Soon, maybe you will be able to eat peacefully again.